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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:24 pm 
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To All The Guys That Have Responded

Where do I begin! My situation is very complicated so I will update you all as follows:

1. My husband died unexpectedly and left me in a dire financial state, which I learned after his death.

2. Our home was under renovation by him when he died. He was a qualified Electrician, Plumber, Air-conditioning Engineer, Telecom Engineer and woodwork was his passion.

3. I have a 40 ft container and a van full of his tools bought to commence "Husband for Hire - Appointments Via the Wife".

4. I also have a new kitchen in boxes and a new bathroom in boxes on the container.

5. Via Paphos People I asked for help - and found 2 guys willing to deal with the removal of the kitchen and the fitting of the new including plumbing, electrical, tiling, woodwork - in exchange for some of my late husbands tools.

6. This was in May. They have the boxed kitchen - but they have not yet decided on what tools they want in exchange for the work for me.

7. Consequently I am on hold awaiting their decision.

8. Not as easy as it sounds as there have been medical complications on their side. I am now at their mercy as they have my boxed kitchen.

9. I can only apologise to all of you who showed interest in the tools, but my hands are presently tied and I just hope that you can all forgive me.

I have no friends here, none of the neighbours have even been across to offer their sympathy or their help. It is just me trying to do the best I can on my own and I again apologise for not getting back to you all.

My Allan would do anything for anyone - no charge for his time - but now I am on my own and in need of so much help - I have not found anyone like my Allan.

Every year since we bought our little house we had just 2 weeks holiday each year here, but I never saw him as he was always off doing things for all the neighbours - but when I need their help............

Please be patient with me, and as soon as I know what the 2 guys want of Allan's tools for doing my kitchen, then I will be able to respond to you.

If there is anyone out there able to help me get my new bathroom installed without charge, then I would love to hear from you.

And if someone can tell me when I will stop grieving and stop crying and just wanting to die too - that would also be good.

Apologies

Janis

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:39 pm 
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Janis,

What a terrible story and my heart goes out to you.

So often people who are the first to help others, are the last to get any help at all.
Hopefully, there will be people on this forum who can help and who can possibly visit, if only for the company, I can imagine that you must be very lonely.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:06 pm 
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Oh, Janis

What can I say? As we hadn't heard from you I assumed you had possibly returned to the UK! How wrong I was! Unfortunately, I am not a plumber, or electrician, but I can make a cup of tea! I have a friend staying with me until next Wednesday, but after that I will be in touch, and we can meet up for a coffee and have a chat, although if you are free tomorrow, some of the ladies are meeting up at the Ladies Coffee Shop in Kato Paphos - do you feel up to joining them there?

Come on guys, surely some of you can spare a few hours to give Janis a hand?

I'm so sorry your neighbours have turned out like this - it's very true, that you don't know how people react after anothers bereavement - I know my Mum had a similar problem with her "friends" when my Dad died - and I cannot tell you how long the greif will last - but I believe you DO come out of the other side, but only when you are right to do so.

I will be in touch next week, and hope that you can get some help.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:24 pm 
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Hi Janis

I cant imagine what you must be going through, if you ever want to be an adoptive nanny to my 18 month old you would be most welcome! :-) I know its hard enough at the best of times finding new friends, but i am very sure that some of the very nice people on this forum and others would be able to help at least with the company part. If you can handle an 18 month about the place i would be one too.

Amanda


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:50 pm 
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Hi Janis, so very sorry to hear of your situation. I have sent you a pm. Take care and hugs on way xx

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:09 pm 
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Gosh have just seen this post, (thanks Alex for posting).
As Jean says Coffee meet 12 tomorrow,you are more than welcome to join us,if not, sure we can sort out a other day very soon, Take care be brave the sun will shine for you again, in mean time there is help out here.
Tricia :there

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:49 pm 
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Hi

Please give me a call , I think I could help out regards the Bathroom !! , but would need to come and see what you have and what is needed .

Either email me at oakland@cytanet.com.cy , call me on 99662418 , or post a response here the choice is yours .

Les


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:29 pm 
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My OH and I have PM'd you.

I have also written on the other thread that although my hubby is not a tradesman, he would be happy to labour for nothing for anyone who can help.

If there is a tradesman out there who wants to take this opportunity up please just PM/e mail us.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:32 pm 
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Bl**dy typical! James (Eric) went back to the UK yesterday! Just when we needed him!

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:03 pm 
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Well - what can I say - I wouldn't have looked at this post, but so glad I did.

Paphos People to the rescue - Janis, I am so sorry to hear of your situation, but you will find plenty of friends on here. The old saying is true - 'When you are up, everyone is your friend, but when you are down, you soon find out who your true friends are'.!!

Do let us know, maybe on here, instead of us all bombarding you with pm's, what you would like us to do regarding meet ups for coffee/tea/ nights out/in etc. I'm sure between the lot of us you will be so busy you will be begging for a rest.

On Wednesday and Friday mornings I go line dancing and you are more that welcome to come and joing us. This Friday at 9 a.m. there is a new complete beginners class starting.......

x x x x

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:07 pm 
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p.s. To Admin.


Could this not be moved into the Day to Day Paphos Life Section ??

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:44 pm 
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My heart goes out to you and hope things start to get better now that you have found some people to help.
I wish there was something I could do for you but drop me a line if you ever want to just pour your heart out.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:53 pm 
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Hi Janis,
Firstly you have nothing to apologise for (except perhaps being a little nieve)
I can only repeat my offer made to you via PM back in May.
Now that the weather has cooled and I have finished my garden I am more than happy to help you with the fitting of kitchens/bathrooms etc.
Offering tools and jewellery as payment was never a good move. There are I'm sure more than enough people on here who would help out free of charge. Me for one.
Give me a call.
I PM'd you my number back in May.
Brian

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2009 9:27 pm 
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Hi Janice
Dont know if you remember me but I met you at Adys one night when he invited us round for a meal, think it was about June. We had a chat then, when you told me what had happened and that night was the first time you had really been out since losing Allan. I did leave you my fone number at the time (unfortnately didnt get yours) and asked you to call if you wanted a chat. As Ive not heard from you thought you were coping a little with your circmstances now I find things are not any better with you. Please call me any time and Ill meet you for a coffee, as we have already met I thought it may me a bit easier to chat to someone who knows your circumstances.
I have PM'd you my fone no.
Regards and hope to meet you again soon

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 29, 2009 1:32 am 
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Hi Janis

I am so sorry to hear about all your problems since the death of your husband, which is traumatic enough on its own. We cannot do anything practical to help as we are still in the Uk but would just like you to know we are thinking about you and that I am sure you will get lots of help from the members of this forum as they have been a great support to us over Kens health problems. Just try and keep you chin up and eventually you will see the light at the end of tunnel.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:48 pm 
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Oh my oh my. Just when I had reached rock bottom, and after spending so many hours days weeks months vertually on my own, I received a reminder with regards to answering my posts re my Allan's tools. That reminder has turned out to be the turning point in my life, as the incredible responses I received reduced me to floods of tears, because it made me realise that it was not yet time to join my Allan, and that I was not alone and that help was out there. The problems I have mentioned on my post are just a few of the ones I to face as there are several more, and I really could not handle them on top of losing my Allan anymore.

I can not thank you all enough and I will respond personally to all the PM's and the posts very soon as there have been so many.

Thanks to you guys, I have found that little light at the end of the tunnel.

Les is going to take a look at my bathroom and deal with this for me - the biggest thank you for this.

Wendy, Jay and Allan all came round this morning and let me pour everything out - it was such a relief to finally let it all go. You guys were wonderful, and I have made my first 3 friends thanks to Paphos People.

Now I know that there is life after a death thanks to all you guys. You have now idea how much of a lifeline you have all thrown me.

Biggest hugs to you all, a very grateful

Janis

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 3:52 pm 
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Janis, That is good news, here's hoping that things will be better for you from now on and a big thank you to the members who have responded with help and support.

:D

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 5:03 pm 
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Axel, we all owe you a huge thankyou as I would not have read thread if you hadn't pointed it out. Janis, it was so lovely to meet you today, and Jay n Wnedy!. So sorry i couldn't stop longer, but will arrange another time, and maybe bring some scones n cream so we can pig out!. Take care and call me whenever you need a natter, hugs xx

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 11:33 pm 
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Janis,
It was so lovely to meet you today (along with Jay and Allan!) we are here for you hun, please remember that, and you no longer have to 'go it alone'. :there
You have my number so call me anytime you need me, I am only a few mins away, and we will get together again soon for another coffee (and maybe Allan will leave me one of his yummy scones when he comes next time :celebrate )
You take care Janis, your friends are now around you to help you.
Wendy.x


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 11:11 am 
Im back on the 7th and will be willing to help F.O.C. if you still need it.

james :greetings


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 12:54 pm 
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james wrote:
Im back on the 7th and will be willing to help F.O.C. if you still need it.

james :greetings


James, I just knew that would be your response - hope you're having a lovely time, and see you soon, mwah

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:03 pm 
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Guys - I am lost for words. I have met more people and been given more help and support in the last 10 days or so than I have had since my Allan died in Feb 2008.

Les is ploughing on with my bathroom - despite the fact that there have been major problems - ie the bath was cast iron and set in concrete - what a job he had, but Dave from Temper Temper came along and gave Les a much needed hand to remove the bath and get it downstairs and outside. It weighs a ton! Les then had to remove all the old concrete and re-concrete the area so that the new bath would sit nicely.

The loos would not fit and their connection is 10 inches from the wall and the actual connection - again set in concrete is 6 inches from the wall. Once again Les managed to find a part that would enable floor and loo to connect. However, the loo is standing high off the floor! Sooooooooooo a piece of wood is to be screwed to the floor and the loo is to be screwed to the piece of wood so that the darn thing will fit! Anyone short sitting on my loo will be swinging their legs!

The new bath - is 10 cms wider than the old bath and it did not have any legs, cradle or panel. Two carpenters came to the rescue. They have made a frame to sit the bath in. They have also removed my bathroom door, and they are going to make it so that it opens outwards instead of inwards. They have also created a bath panel.

The shower panel is not long enough - it is the sort that goes from one end of the bath to the other with a sliding door in the middle and it would not sit on the new bath edge properly. Carpenters to the rescue again.

I can not thank Les and the carpenters enough. What should have been a simple job has turned out to be a nightmare of a job - but the guys have not once complained..............

As I said earlier - Thank You is not enough.

The guys are starting my kitchen on Monday - so I will give you all another update later.

Also - my apologies to my new friends who came round for coffee for the lack of contact - but at the moment my house is like a building site and I am smiling!

Luv & hugs

Janis

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2009 7:51 am 
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Oh my, sounds like fun and games there!. So pleased all is getting sorted for you. No worries re contact, its fine!. Glad things are getting better for you. Will give you a call when I get back from holiday. xx

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2009 8:58 am 
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Keep smiling. :D glad to hear things are moving on for you.
when you get sorted would be nice to see you at a coffee meet with wendy.
Tricia

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2009 8:26 pm 
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Excellent news hun, glad hey are sorting things for you. :clap
When you are ready, we will nip down and I will introduce you Tricia, she is a lovely lady and we can have coffee together, then when you are ready again, you can come to a coffee meet up with more friends, its a lovely relaxed atmosphere and I am sure you will love it.
I will give you a ring tomorrow and we can meet up again soon if you want ok :celeb2
Wendy. :greetings


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