Paphos People

COMPLAINING

How are you at complaining when you get bad service or faulty goods? When you are in a restaurant and the waiter asks you if your meal is alright, do you tell him if there is a problem or do you do the polite English thing and smile and say ‘everything is delicious’ even if it isn’t.
We have a friend, Richard, who regularly complains when it is required, also in fairness he compliments if the service is good.

His job is an independent business consultant, brought in by large companies to analyse their business system and make cost-cutting savings. He is very good at his job and gets paid accordingly. He is also not afraid to speak his mind generally.
If you ever have a disagreement with him, he can finish it by saying “I don’t care what you say, I KNOW that I’m right” that usually ends the argument.

On one occasion, a group of us went for a meal at a very popular country pub, called ‘The Gardeners Arms’ in Alderton, a very nice Cotswold village. This pub was run by Jack Terry and his wife Jane. He was not only the landlord but the head chef as well. He made a point of coming out of the kitchen and asking the clientele if their food was all right and if not what suggestions could they make for improvements. He was always prepared to listen or explain why the suggestion was not viable. That attitude made him a very popular figure and to eat there was always a pleasure. He had a Grand piano in the bar and a resident pianist. It was truly a comfortable country pub and restaurant.
The night we went, it was obvious that the pub had changed hands, the piano was gone and we were greeted by a very young but pleasant waitress who directed us to our table.
“Where’s Jack?” asked Richard.
“He retired two months ago” was the reply.
As we sat down Richard replied “Well I hope you are maintaining his reputation”.
“We do our best sir” she said.

We all ordered our meals and enjoyed a drink and a chat while we waited, all agreeing that standards would have to be very high to even come close to the service we were used to.
The meals all arrived at the same time, so far so good. One of our party, Samantha, had ordered a steak and ale pie, with chips and vegetables. It looked spectacular in its china dish with a puff pastry cover nicely browned all over. Eagerly she plunged her knife into the pie. The pastry shattered into about a dozen pieces, revealing about an inch of congealed meat and gravy in the bottom of the dish. The pie was plainly overcooked.
“Miss, can you come here please” said Richard.
The waitress came over.
“Is there a problem sir?” she said.
“Yes there is, we can’t eat this pie, it’s burnt”.
The waitress picked up the knife and lifted a piece of the crust.
“It’s only a little bit brown” she said.
Richard’s lips tightened.
“Look - we’re not discussing the extent of the burns, whether they are third, second or first degree burns. Your decision, which you will make very soon, will be to take this meal back to the kitchen and get it replaced with another”
The waitress picked up the plate without a word and disappeared into the kitchen. A few minutes later she re-appeared with a fresh meal which was acceptable.
The owner of the restaurant came over to ask us if everything was satisfactory.
Richard was now in total control of the situation and proceeded to tell him of the problem.
“You have acquired a business with an excellent reputation for quality and service. In order to keep that up you cannot afford slip-ups like we have just experienced. Your staff have let you down. You should now be in the kitchen ‘Kicking somebody’s butt”.
The owner stood red-faced and offered us a complimentary round of drinks, which we accepted, then disappeared into the kitchen.
We never returned to the restaurant so presumably the owner took Richard’s advice and tightened things up. I hope so.


However things didn’t always go Richard’s way, one night we were having a meal in an Indian Restaurant, Richard had been drinking during the day and was quite loud and got carried away with his own importance.
“Waiter this curry is rather bland, could you bring me a bowl of chillies please”.
“Of course sir” replied the waiter, appearing a few moments later with a small bowl of chillies attractively arranged with green chillies around the outside and a brilliant red one in the middle.
Taking a green chilli and munching it noisily Richard declared “That’s better” to all the other diners. He ate two or three other green chillies with great aplomb. He then picked up the red one
“I’m looking forward to this one!”
He took a huge bite and I’m sure he was about to say how wonderful it was but all that came out was a stifled “AArgh” as he reached for a glass of water. The waiter was looking up to the ceiling and whistling to himself, while four faces were peering through the glass panels in the kitchen door. Richard was speechless for at least five minutes and pretty quiet for the rest of the evening.
So be careful what you complain about.