Paphos People

FUNNY BUSINESS....

Hello son how are you? Well it’s over a year now since you emigrated to Australia and left me and your Dad here on our own here in, as you put it, grey and cold old London. But it was your decision and we didn’t want to stand in your way. Anyway it must be quite nice to see the sun at least once in a while.
I know that you had to try really hard to get the necessary qualifications and approval from the Australia House people.
How are they treating you? Don’t take any notice if they call you a winging pom, just remember you are British and winging is part of your heritage. Any way you haven’t got a criminal based family record like most of them have thieves and vagabonds the lot of them.

The family all want to be remembered to you, well all except your cousin Peter. He got out last week but who knows for how long that will be for. He was surprised to learn that you have gone, I remember him shouting to you as they took him down
‘I’ll see YOU when I get out’.
He still seems to think that it was your testimony that sent him away in the first place. His own fault if you ask me, couldn’t keep his sticky fingers out of the till.
Those nice Kray boys came round the other day with him asking for you, so I told them I would forward your address when you found somewhere permanent. Peter didn’t look too well, he said that he had fallen down some steps.

Your instant fortune winning the Pools couldn’t have come at a better time could it, it’s funny though, neither your Dad nor me knew that you even did the pools.

Your Dad says he reckons he would get on well in the outback, he should do he spends a lot of time out back in the yard over here.
There seems to be a lot of post for you piling up here mostly from that nice building society that you got the mortgage on our old family home with. What exactly is a mortgage? Probably just telling you how much interest you have got on your money.


Love from your
Mum and Dad



Hello Mum and Dad

This is just a quick line to let you know that I’m all right. The weather here is just great it will soon be summer and my new business venture has attracted a lot of investors and building work will start soon. A fully enclosed sports and adventure park is what this country is crying out for, I’m going to stock it up with crocs and exotic spiders cockroaches and other delightful creatures. I’m looking forward to some really fast swimming times from the punters once those crocs get settled in.
I reckon I could make a fortune if I can get some famous names to come and stay, and I’ve thought of a name already – OUTA HERE. Then all the famous people could say ‘I’m a celebrity get me outa here’ catchy eh!
I still haven’t got a permanent address, so carry on using the PO Box Number that you have got as I’m too busy to put any roots down yet.
Anyway I like being on the move ducking and diving.

Love
Billy